The Many Hands of God

Here’s a new one: an attempt to sell a rockslide rendered Hand of God on eBay.



The term “Hand of God” can have very different meanings. Michelangelo’s version from the Sistine Chapel’s “Creation of Adam” is without a doubt the most famous.



But, if you know more about World Cup soccer than art history, Diego Maradona’s infamous “Hand of God goal” from the 1986 Argentina/England World Cup Quarter-Final match probably comes to mind. One of the sport’s most lauded athletes scored two goals on that day, one that he hit in with his hand but was never penalized for, the other a result of Maradona dribbling around 6 British players to score what has since been dubbed “Goal of the Century.” (Argentina won the game, and the World Cup that year.)



If you know about symbolism in antiquity and world religions, “Hand of God” signifies khamsa, or hamsa. The five-fingered figure is believed to have Phoenician origins though it is most commonly associated with Judaism and Islam. Not only do our hands have five fingers, but the Jewish Torah comprises the first five books of the Bible and Islam has its Five Pillars.



According to this CNN report, if you ask Paul Grayhek what the Hand of God looks like, he’ll show you the photograph above, and then try to sell it to you. The Coeur d’Alene, Idaho, resident lost his job and during Lent had been praying. Then on March 8 within a stone’s throw of his home the rocks tumbled, leaving this form, which is about nine feet tall and four feet wide.

Excavating this mass would be expensive, but no worries, you aren’t getting anything material. Says the report: “The buyer will ‘basically be buying the rights, complete and exclusive rights’ to the rock, including literary and movie rights, according to Grayhek.”

He goes on to say: “People think I'm some holier-than-thou person trying to get rich. I'm not . . . The purpose is to spread the story of God and eBay is just a vehicle.”

Well, in this instance eBay is a bit of a jalopy because as of writing this post the item has been removed. Maybe God thought there were better ways to spread His story. Or maybe God’s agent got in touch with Grayhek and explained that literary and movie rights to all rocks and stones have already been sold . . .

A Colorful Stone

Sergio Romero of Pocatello, Idaho, took a trip to Las Vegas last year and traded an antique coin purse for the colorful stone pictured above. According to this KPVI story, back at home while polishing the new acquisition Romero discovered what he sees as the Virgin Mary in the asparagus-tip shaped blue of the stone. Said Romero: “I'm not a religious man. This has kind of turned me to looking into religion. As a matter of fact, I think I might even go to church this Sunday.”

I don’t see the shape, but the jade and blue are dazzling. That must have been some antique coin purse. Perhaps sometime soon Romero will be able to get the purse back, because no amount of newly discovered faith is going to keep him from selling this on eBay, which he plans to do within the next month.

If Everyone Else Does It, It Must Be Okay

Connie Covert from Idaho Falls, Idaho, has come out of the closet. No, wait, she’s come out about her closet. According to this Local News 8 report, Covert first noticed an image of Jesus on this door in her home over 30 years ago but “was afraid to tell anyone fearing she would be called crazy.” All of the stories about Jesus and the Virgin Mary showing up in all sorts of places inspired Covert to make her secret public. Of the people she has shown, only about half see Jesus, while others see a hobo or a horse. I kind of see Macho Man Randy Savage.



Covert is not religious, but she interprets the face as a sign that something has been looking over her for decades, especially since her life is tragedy free: “Trailer hasn’t burned down or anything.” The article doesn’t establish any specific reason for Covert’s confession, though it does make clear that she has no intention of selling the image on eBay.

Attitudes change with the times. Sure, there is still plenty of bigotry and racism out there – all over the world – but it is fair to say that culture at large, as filtered through the media, has become more accepting of pretty much everyone and everything, even, apparently, how people will think of you if you claim to see Jesus, Mary or Mickey Mouse in a water stain. What once might have resulted in your neighbors inconspicuously whispering about you has become something of a status symbol, or at least a way to attract some attention and get your fifteen minutes of fame.

Maybe that’s the essence of this shift in perception, that getting noticed, being on the news, even for less than complimentary reasons, is the status symbol. Because if you read enough reader comments tagged on to the end of these Madonna of the Toast stories, plenty of people like Covert get ridiculed, pretty harshly at times. But, no matter what people write and say about you, if your story is out there, circulating all over the world, then you have arrived: I can be Googled, therefore I am.

Hopefully Covert doesn’t regret making her story known.

What I See in Dick Cheney's Sunglasses

If you are reading this, I find it hard to believe that you haven’t seen this White House sanctioned photograph of Dick Cheney – Friday’s infectious internet entertainment (and of course entertainment becomes the news, or is the news: makes you wonder). Here is something from Wired.

Seems pretty clear to me that the reflections in the Veep’s shades are his wrists, maybe some knuckles. They bulge in such a way that led some (okay, many) to speculate whether or not Cheney had lied to his wife and instead of going fishing, got strippers (and who says that you can’t do both at once?). Upon further examination, everyone now seems to agree that there is no woman in front of Cheney (although those Bohemian Grove summer retreats sound pretty wild, but this was in Idaho).

This was the lede that circulated:

The Virgin Mary on a grilled cheese and the Illinois-shaped corn flake appear to have new competition for webbies' fascination . . .

Our relationship with the image is on a fast track to a destination that I can’t locate, though I’m certainly along for the ride. What’s really interesting about this Cheney picture is that people are studying and speculating about an image of a reflection (another image). They are not examining the actual reflection. The stories I tend to relate are about one person’s interpretation of a physical object marked in some way with a recognizable, iconic form, and how then that is disseminated into the culture.

This tendency to find meaning in the abstract, to see something and make it mean something, or want it to mean something, strikes me as a trait that makes us human. The conspiracy theorist tries to force in one more piece of the puzzle; someone down on their luck sees a just budding tree that makes life a little, or a lot, better; the carefree kid yanks a burnt Pop Tart out of the toaster, sees a sneaker logo and sells it on eBay. We invest meaning in the visual – for an array of reasons from the spiritual to the absurd – for the sake of recognition. What we see is how we place ourselves in this world.

A couple of weeks ago, I posted my 100th entry. It’s been more than a year of compiling these stories in the wake of the book, and I am floored by how they still draw me in because of how they mirror and reflect our world. I’ll be traveling for the next couple of weeks. I might chime in, I might not. But come May, I’ll be back, looking to spruce the place up a bit, trying to take all of these little stories and weave them together. It’s certainly something I do in Madonna of the Toast, but these stories don’t stop.

Wild, Wild West

It's been a mild winter here in New York, so the brazen cold gripping the region over the last couple of days has gotten me even more psyched for my week in California spreading the word about Madonna of the Toast.



On Saturday, March 10 at Hotel Utah in San Francisco, I'll be reading, along with some of my pals. Doors are at 8:00, readings begin at 9:00. Sliding scale admission, but $15 gets you a copy of the book. There will be music, too!



Then on Thursday, March 15 at The Venice Contemporary in Los Angeles, I'm reading with Mike the Poet and fellow MBP author Mark Ferem. The event is free, and so are select drinks from the bar! How can you go wrong?



And in the spirit of grand western landscapes, here is what one man claims is the Virgin Mary in basalt. The photograph comes from the Times-News, which reported the story of this sighting in Twin Falls, Idaho, by Shoshone Falls. It was reported just a few weeks ago, though it didn't get much traction in the media.

More anon!